On the extremity of civilized space,

hanging on the ragged edge of unlawfulness, drifts what many call
“The Old Lady”,
The mother of all multi-dimensional ports in the galaxy.
Nestled in the depths of the ever-growing goliath,
its neutrality makes it a sanctuary for the hunted; asylum for those fleeing conflict, anchorage for merchants, and a marketplace for all.
A melting pot of the innocent, scoundrels and depravity; a place everyone is welcome…
if they can pay.

The bar to end all bars …..

Artist : Sam Rowan - Writer : Fern Hodgeson

Doscilla and Dorvaria  

Identifies as: Female & Male

Doscilla and Dorvaria are a pair of intensely in love Creatorians. This species is well known for experiencing strong feelings but they are normally focused on productivity in their work. 

Doscilla, an elegant and statuesque Creatorian, spent most of her life being admired for her brain. Doscilla’s family is well known in the country of Corffoon on Creatoria for their exceptional dedication to work. Extraordinarily talented with financial matters, they made so many credits that they paid others to take them away. Doscilla, a highly intelligent Creatorian, considered love a folly until meeting Dorvaria.

In Creatoria, males are considerably smaller than females with Dorvaria being particularly small for a male. He was unphased by this. Highly intelligent, he worked as an engineer for the city of Creybar, designing a sophisticated dam that provided power for the city as well as purified the water. Everyone came to see the opening of the monolith which went awry when the crowd became so statically charged by the dam’s turbines that they got stuck together. Undeterred, Dovaria proudly showed the dam’s cleansing potential and he met Doscilla whilst handing out water samples. Captivated by each other, they returned to the dam every night and soon chose to officially unify and celebrate with a tour of the nearby galaxies. They came to the Cantina for their first meal as a united couple and return regularly to celebrate their union, toasting each other over a glass of electrified vodka. They adore the unusual cuisine and wide doorways.

  • Likes: Unusual food, travel and charades
  • Dislikes: Rock salt and dogs that lick them
  • Special Skills: They can taste all over their bodies

Artist : Sam Rowan - Writer : Fern Hodgeson

Urbert Plove

Identifies as: Male

Of Ackavarium descent, but born on Earth in Watford, England, Urbert chose to take a year off to travel after his studies.

Feeling exhausted from his ‘Arts and Hearts’ course – where students would discuss how art, music and technology make them feel – he thought he would hitchhike his way around Earth to find himself. Ironically, he has been lost for two years now and has left Earth entirely but he’s considering it part of his additional education.

A keen listener with a penchant for ‘deep’ conversations, he adores chatting to people, even those who don’t talk back.  Urbert isn’t sure what he wants to do with his life, but he is desperately hoping to get a job tending bar in the Cantina where he would be able to talk to all the customers all day long. He likes it here for the vast array of people and hopes to meet someone special who likes spaghetti, his favourite food.


He loves karaoke and is thrilled when someone joins him for a duet. A big softy at heart, he doesn’t realise when he is in danger and often it will pass him by unscathed.

He’s started applying for a British Culture Grant and is enthralled with the idea of becoming an English country gentleman. So much so, he’s perfected an accent which he thought was the ‘Queen’s English’ but sounds a little cockney.

  • Likes: Spaghetti, new people and small animals
  • Dislikes: Water sports, gherkins and deadlines
  • Special Skills: Intense listener, can hear on quantum levels if he chooses

Artist : Sam Rowan - Writer : Fern Hodgeson

Credibo and Gorgeo

Credibo was a revolutionary creation in  Reforio on Cleff.

A new machine that was the closest to a bionic being, Credibo was made by combining metal and living tissue. The experiment, however, went wrong and the living tissue which was used in the experiment contained stem cells of the Snapping Gorian, an amphibious creature known for its insatiable appetite. So notorious is this species’ appetite that it destroyed an entire planet through pure gluttony.

Credibo feels Gorgeon’s desire for food and his pangs of hunger. He has learnt more emotions from Gorgeon, enabling him to empathize with him and develop a protective feeling towards Gorgeon. As well as wanting to protect Gorgeon from eating himself to death, the two have become the best of friends, even making up their own best friend language. 

As a failed experiment, they were scheduled to be destroyed by the United Units in Reforio. Credibo, aware of the fate that awaited them, devised a plan with Gorgeon to escape. Disguised as garbage worker units, they successfully smuggled themselves out of the building and into the multiple canals of the city. Gorgeon, a natural swimmer, was able to guide Credibo away using his magnetic sense for the ocean.

There they stowed away on a commercial flight and roamed the galaxies looking for a home and more importantly, food. 

Gorgeon has a fear of soups after accidentally being trapped in one when Credibo tried to reach for a condiment for Gorgeon during a dinner party and ended up with Gorgeon getting the bowl stuck on his face.

Credibo earns money as a charging station due to his ability to extract energy from the food Gorgeon eats. The greater quantities Gorgeon eats, the higher output of power and more money Credibo can make. They enjoy this bar due to its extensive selection of food, lack of soups and Credibo’s developing taste for exotic drinks.

  •  Likes: Extra spicy Mexican food and soap operas 
  •  Dislikes: Soup and bullying
  • Special skills : An electrical pulse that can instantly charge a battery, a magnetic personality and sense for navigation

Artist : Sam Rowan - Writer : Fern Hodgeson

Zendon Zez

Identifies as: Male

A former captain in the wars against Orbiolcim, Zendon was a highly decorated Captain of the Whajooth Legion, constantly battling the ravages of the Gingerianvituslians army – a faceless, continually multiplying organism with the ability to expand itself at a terrifying rate. The Gingerianvituslians army is known for decimating entire cities around the planet of Shoolon and in Zendon’s home country of Freyna and Gorst. With cities made of organic tissue and reinforced ossein like material, they often forgot they lived on a living planet of the Great and Mighty Meeytu, a planet whose entire surface was both nurtured and sustained while Meeytu slumbered. The wars were dangerous but exhilarating for Zendon, giving his life meaning and purpose. His life took a turn for the worst when a merchant visited their small country bringing with him a deadly but highly prized substance which could energise and fuel a body ideal for soldiers. This substance is known as Esor. Zendon, unfortunately, became addicted to it, his life constantly distracted and consumed by the need to nibble on the sweet granulations. He followed the Esor merchant on his various travels, seeing his entire planet and then on to new ones. One day, delirious from an Esore high, he found himself in the Cantina with no recollection of how he got there. He has spent months working on reducing the Esor content in his body in the hope he might be able to return to his old life.

  • Likes: Esor, coloured fairy lights and a perfectly padded helmet
  • Dislikes: Being patted on the head
  • Special skills: Speed and a high pitch scream which can break granite 


(NATIONALITY) – Shoolonese

Artist : Sam Rowan - Writer : Fern Hodgeson


Identifies as: Other

Greibbles are the young infants of the Mancornas who are highly prized for their telepathic skills and ability to absorb information through breathing the aura of an information source. They are often stolen and sold for their ability to be used as Quantum-Matter Supercomputers.

Suspended in floating amniotic sacks, they can remain in this condition long term. To trigger their birth they must be fed milk of the Tinyock, a sap their parents would ordinarily use in the nest for waterproofing.

These Gribbles have been stolen and left in the bar due to the intoxication and subsequent murder of their kidnapper. 

They have developed a taste for beer and have learnt enough songs from the cantina customers that they perform as a jukebox after 8pm in the bar for a small fee. 

The Greibbles can generate static electricity if they rub against each other, this rarely happens but if they are dancing to music it can and unfortunately anyone standing nearby risks getting a little zap.

  • Likes: Music with a lot of bass and carbonated drinks
  • Dislikes: Air conditioning
  • Special skills: Telepathy, super intelligence and they give off a faint lavender smell 


(NATIONALITY) – Mancornan

Artist : Sam Rowan - Writer : Fern Hodgeson

Kysseme XOI

Identifies as: Female

Identifies as: Female

A Lothrene international Art trader.  Kysseme, once a highly successful techno DJ, she left the scene after her ultrasonic bass accidentally flattened the city of Graffia in Yeltorus on Gella. With the death of thousands attributed to her she became a pariah and forced to change her identity. She attempted to reinvent herself but kept forgetting her new name.

Kysseme enjoys the Cantina as she is unknown there. She holds a tiny grain of hope of meeting the enigmatic charming pilot she happened to meet 5 years ago and who promised to steal her away with him but has never seen since.

Prone to nasal infections she struggles with cleaning the inside of her dome and must enlist the help of a small creature known as a Gemimorph. Who cleans the dome regularly with his squeegee. She pays him in eyelashes.

  • Likes: Cocktails and silicone based moisturisers
  • Dislikes: Static fabric and Lime
  • Special Skills: Lock picking and forging physical identification scanners

(PLANET) Lothren – Kysseme’s home planet
(PLANET) Gella – (STATE) Graffia – (CITY) Gella
(CREATURE) Gemimorph

Artist : Sam Rowan - Writer : Fern Hodgeson

Tanks and LEOD

Tankfrey Tankilo

Originally an Aureum Dust miner on his home planet of Crafforfom. The precious metal was used in the circuitry of the advanced robots that were being created on Craffofom by the Sidnia company. The dust gradually made Tanks extremely ill and reliant on a respirator. 

Determined to continue living his life to the full after retiring he invested in a life preserver robot LEOD ( Life Enhancing Omni-Assisting Droid) allowing him to explore his new hobby as a wedding photographer across the various galaxies.

Despite the tank accurately replicating the atmosphere of his home planet he still wheezes. The dust damage to Tanks’s health results in him expelling toxic clouds of gas which need to be safely processed and kept away from his photographs or he risks them combusting.

LEOD, originally a highly decorated soldier responsible for capturing large colonies for the Sidnia Company. He accidentally uploaded a virus to his tactical unit during a forced update which led to the loss of a city domination. Despite it not being within his control he became the scapegoat for the company and was given a dishonourable discharge. Desperate for work he chose the life of Vending and after an exhausting few years as a vending machine tired of being kicked, manhandled and having limbs inserted into him he decided a new career as a life sustainer would be more satisfying and less risky.

 He was assigned to Tanks and they have ever since had a love hate relationship. LEOD works for Tanks for 14 hours out of 24 for the remaining time LEOD may come and go as he pleases as long as he preserves Tanks. LEOD enjoys visiting the Cantina as they serve a particular lubricant which helps numb the anger he has for his past.

  • Likes: Tanks: vacuum cleaners and napping  LEOD: Being left alone
  • Dislikes: Tanks: the motion sick tablets he has to take whilst on board LEOD and cats. LEOD: Tanks and humid places
  • Special Skills: Tanks has advanced knowledge of mineral dust and its applications. LEOD has extensive logic skills and can project a carton of peanuts up to 10 meters.

Artist : Sam Rowan - Writer : Fern Hodgeson

Calphra Torent

Identifies as : Male

Calphra was once a royal bodyguard for the Reigning monarch of Looratan; Cogreph. During a military coup Cogreph was kidnapped whilst under the care of Calphra who has never lived down the shame. Despite being mortally wounded in the battle, he survived, hiding in the vast swamps of Looratan’s wetlands. He was stalked by the vicious Carpree, a carnivorous amphibious creature relentless in its pursuit of prey. Close to death he finally met a trade pilot, Koron, who at the time was smuggling forbidden lingerie and had hidden his stash in the cave Calphra was resting in recovering from his wounds. Koron used some of his wares to patch up Calphra without any promise of recompense. Seeing his impressive weapons and armour, Koron invited him to become part of his crew. During this terrifying ordeal Calphra discovered an ability to adapt his skin colour to his environment and unintentionally it reflects his emotions as well. Freed from his miserable exile Calphra chose to redeem himself by protecting Koron on his ‘secret’ missions. Calphra likes to stop at the bar with Koron between their trading destinations and also to pick up leads for more business.

  • Likes: The texture of silk, slow motion photography and manners
  • Dislikes: The smell of pine, blunt blades and rudeness
  • Special Skills: Vibration sensory in his hands and feet allows him to predict his opponents moves in any fight

(PLANET) – Looratan
(MONARCH) – Cogreph
(CREATURE) – Carpree

Artist : Sam Rowan - Writer : Fern Hodgeson


Identifies as: Male

A passionate foodie. He has made it his mission to travel the galaxy looking for the best eateries in the galaxy. 

A travelling salesman by trade looking for the best deal on fresh water to be taken back to his drought ridden planet. His unfortunate addiction to chips has led him to be away from his planet longer than he intended. He is too embarrassed to return due to losing the water whilst en route to various planets and a recent attempt to substitute it with vinegar went disappointingly wrong and he lost more water in the process.

Rumours reached him that he had been made a missing person on his home planet so he feels less pressure to return.

Unable to show emotion very well, he often finds he is misunderstood and it may look like he’s not listening. He is. But this doesn’t stop others tapping his sphere and raising their voices at him.

A regular reviewer on Star-Trip Advisor, he considers himself quite the connoisseur of intergalactic food. His high standards and scathing reviews have led to him being refused service at countless establishments. Unphased, he secretly desires a career change to a food critic. Specialising in chips and the fried potato arena.

  • Likes: Chips,Exceedingly greasy food, chips, blue lights, chips and the sound of burps
  • Dislikes: Narrow doorways and loud noises. Food colouring, it makes his sphere water murky
  • Special Skills: Negotiation skills but too impulsive with his money. His ability to annoy others

Artist : Sam Rowan - Writer : Fern Hodgeson

Melayny Cholya

Identifies as: Sub female

A Pynfryack. Melayny specialises in quiz questions on her native planet of Heropoeia where knowledge is prized above all else. This also being their source of nutrients and accounts for their survival. Melayny likes to go to the bar to pick up on new knowledge from the various attendees there, feeding upon the new stories and the information she can garner. 

Unfortunately she frequently comes across those with lesser intelligence which can make her feel light headed and confused. She has an insatiable appetite for gossip. Whether it be about someone or something she adores it. It’s such a powerful type of knowledge for her she can become fully intoxicated, making her speech slur, her decisions poor and the ultimate embarrassment,  answering a quiz question wrong. Melayny loves to enter the quizzes held at the Cantina which she almost always wins. She has a superior knowledge but has a constant feeling of imposter syndrome on her home planet so she also finds solace being at the bar with lesser intelligent beings.

  • Aluminium foil and old double A batteries which react with her skin and make her busy mind go quiet
  • Dislikes: Strong smells, peanut brittle and litter
  • Special skills: Psychokinesis

(PLANET) – Heropoeia